But if this were true. It isn’t. We wish it were true, but it’s really just a little Arts and Entertainment piece that you will hopefully find entertaining or at least slightly amusing. Special thanks to my dad and his mad Photoshop skillz. Hawaii loves Spam. Although made in the Midwest,...

It takes a certain lifestyle, coupled with an uncommonly flexible schedule and a particular zeal for finger foods to really appreciate a good happy hour. However, if you are of that ilk, you pretty much cannot go wrong at Gannon’s. The food is notably well-priced (albeit portions are scaled...

It’s been almost a month since someone last robbed the First Hawaiian Bank in Pukalani. We bet there are a few of you out there thinking “third time’s the charm” and possibly considering your own hit. Sure, you have a dirt bike and some camouflage pants. Perhaps your lady has been whining...

Cinnamon Roll Fair/Place (The sign says “Fair” but the van and business cards say “Place.” We suspect a slow-motion name change is underway) is something of a south Kihei institution. In business since 1983, that’s three decades of sweet, sticky, doughy goodness. However, before we focus on...

From the mind of Donavita Quixota-Wolf: Sorry to bother you, but I’m in the midst of a great adventure: spreading chivalry, righting wrongs, and slaying beasts. There’s something terrible here amongst us, and I need to gather others to the cause. I think you can help. So here’s the story: I...

The confirmation that the February 26 power outage at the Kahului Airport was caused by a chicken found inside a transformer in the rental car area validated investigators’ worst fears. A spokesperson commented, “For several months now, there has been talk of a renegade band of...

The Hawaii Visitors and Convention Bureau (HVCB) recently launched a month-long marketing blitz in New York and Chicago, two of its largest markets, both of which they identified as being on the “East Coast” even though the one that starts with a “C” is actually in the Midwest. Seriously....

Dining at Ramen Ya in the Queen K mall started off a little more like a double-dog dare than a promising enterprise. Ominous phrases like “noodles in dirty dishwater,” and “it’s a carb carnival and the protein isn’t invited” were tossed about, proving the dare-makers aren’t just mean… they’re...

Once again, dear friends, this has been posted in “Entertainment,” which is to say it’s meant to entertain you.   Yet again, the airlift crews have been called out to the Bamboo Forest. We’re not judging the whos, whats, hows or whys of that situation, but it did seem like good timing to...

You are not an accountant. Nonetheless, despite your pledges that THIS is the year you hire a pro, there you are on April 15th: installing TurboTax, sweating bullets, rifling through mountains of paper, and drinking heavily. We’ve been there. More than once. However, our pain is your gain. We...

Phil G. 250 affordable housing units!? We can’t have that. Absolutely not. It’s a bait and switch if I’ve ever seen one. Let me paint the picture:  do you know what they mean by ‘affordable’? They mean “projects.” You heard me right: projects. I have an inside source who has tipped me off,...

If you’ve lived on this island for any length of time or even just visit regularly, you know that there are a few select happy hours that rock. Hard. Three’s Bar and Grill in Kihei is no doubt one of them. Statistics indicate that three in five restaurants close or change owners in the first...

***Editor’s note: this article is purely satirical and in response to a Maui senator’s proposed law to enable celebrities to take civil action against the paparazzi or anyone harassing them in Hawaii (roughly speaking). That proposed law is called the Steven Tyler Act. And no, Vanessa Wolf is...

Could Maui’s own Sheldon Simeon win it all on Bravo’s Top Chef Season 10? We’re only a couple more episodes from finding out, and it’s still well within his grasp. He had his toughest night yet on last week’s episode. We talked with him to get some insider information and discover if the...

First off, let me say I’m not just some jerk with a lot of opinions about whether or not marijuana should be legalized, or given away as a free gift when you open a bank account, or smoked in movie theaters, or put on the flag in the place of those little stars. Well, I am saying that, but I...

When you dine at Kono’s on the Green, one word of exclamation comes to mind: wow. But not always in a good way. Let’s start with the good wow moments first. For one, the view is to die for. Situated above the stunning Elleair Golf Course, it’s nothing but lush green grass and water traps as...

Maui’s own Chef Sheldon Simeon of Star Noodle and Leoda’s Pie Shop continues to rock it on Bravo’s Top Chef, finishing in the top three on last week’s episode. It’s now down to the last five “cheftestants,” and we caught up to Sheldon to ask some foodie insider questions and reconfirm that...

**Editor’s note: This article is based on yesterday’s story about a woman who was arrested after falling through the ceiling of Kihei Police Station.** It’s always alarming when someone unexpectedly crashes through the ceiling of a police station, and we sincerely hope everything works out...

Award-winning comedian Margaret Cho is bringing her new show “Mother,” to Maui’s Castle Theater on Friday, Feb. 8. We talked to the often controversial and always funny comedian about her show, her childhood aspirations, and what she’d order for a last meal. Maui Now: So your new show is...

If you have ever lamented to a friend, “Why isn’t there a restaurant where I can plop down at the table of my choice, be greeted in a friendly manner, and receive a $3 hamburger five minutes later?” then you are not alone. If you thought that $3 full-service restaurant hamburger fantasy was...