Act I – The Wanderers: Seeking Foretold Fortune The Scene: a modest strip-mall restaurant with a knockout view of Foodland. Stage Left: Enter Waiter, a ubiquitous presence at the restaurant. If you require a refresher – and even if you don’t – on some basic Spanish, Waiter (serving also as...

Boz Scaggs, a man we thought had a long white beard like Gandalf but apparently does n0t, will be playing a solo show at the MACC’s Castle Theater this Thursday, Nov. 14 at 7:30 p.m. Scaggs is described by promoters as “both a musical seeker and a man of sizable talent as a singer, songwriter...

Lana’i ‘Ohana Poke Market really chaps our hide. Without hesitation, the worst thing about the place is that it’s on Lana’i, a 50-minute, occasionally nauseating boat ride from Maui. Tis bullsh*t, my friends. If that weren’t enough, while you are within chewing distance of it, ‘Ohana Poke...

Back in fourth grade, we had a major crush on a boy named Robbie Knowles. He was an odd little dude who regularly did a spot-on monkey impression for no apparent reason. It was strictly a “longing from afar” kind of thing that was forced into suppression when a close friend wrote an a capella...

As a thick layer of vog continues to plague Maui, a group of local residents opposed to the pollution have organized a sign-waving event to raise awareness about their plight. “This has got to stop,” said watery-eyed Kihei resident Susan Johnston. “I can barely breathe, I get horrible...

Procrastinators, take heart. Just because tomorrow is Halloween and you don’t have a costume, doesn’t mean you can’t come through in the final hours. We have five simple, semi-timely and super cheap DIY ideas for you. 1. 50 Shades of Gray Head to Home Depot, Lowes,  or the paint section of...

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of yoga studios, it was the age of kombucha, it was the epoch of composting, it was the epoch of GMOs, it was the season of avocados, it was the season of star fruit, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair,...

If you previously dined at Prakong Tongsod’s culinary outpost in Hana, you already expected big things from Maui Thai Bistro. Open about three weeks now, Tongsod is behind the stove at the recently revamped Kihei restaurant. Many of her Hana staples can be found on the new menu and we started...

Blues artist Kevin Moore, or Keb’ Mo’ as he’s more commonly known, is a three-time Grammy Award-winning blues musician. The singer, guitarist, and songwriter is described in his JamBase biography as “a living link to the seminal Delta blues that travelled up the Mississippi River and across...

Brigit and Bernard’s Garden Café is pretty much Kahului’s answer to Epcot Center. Admittedly, you can’t get your picture taken eating waffles next to Minnie Mouse or tour the home of the future, but it’s one of the few spots where you can find Greek, Italian, German, French, Swiss, American...

Reports indicate that area whales were outraged to learn that a recently migrated humpback known as “Skippy” was spotted on Saturday morning, gallivanting about two miles from Molokini. Upon hearing the news, one particularly incensed whale was overheard commenting, “Skippy screwed up...

You know how people get all nostalgic about Maui in the 1960s? If you’d like to find out what all the fuss is about, beat a path to Jack’s Inn in Kahului and get a taste of life in the islands 50 years ago… well, at least the décor. In the corner of a building shared with the Glidden...

Bitch, make me a sandwich. This is absolutely not something you should ever say to the lovely lady taking your order behind the counter at the 808 Deli, largely because she is not the one doing the actual sandwich making. Plus, she just called you “hon” and seems to be a nice person, and your...

In honor in this weekend’s 43rd Maui Marathon, let’s talk about a different kind of endurance. You don’t just show up at JB’s Kitchen in Wailuku. It’s more like something you need to condition for at spring training. Materials you’ll need: Elastic waistband pants, preferably in dark colors....

By Vanessa Wolf Tony Bennett is not only real, he can croon.  Too bad for the fictional “most interesting man in the world.” Get an earful of the 87-year-old icon’s stylings next Tuesday at 7:30 p.m. when he plays the MACC’s Castle Theater with his daughter Antonia Bennett . As for the title...

Can you name all the items associated with the “12 Days of Christmas” song? Neither can we. But supposing we could, surely some of those gifts were real stinkers. Lords a-leaping? Can you even return those guys? And even if you can, thanks for the chore, True Love. Maybe a gift card next...

WARNING: SATIRE… MOSTLY. Most of this is utter nonsense, but some of it near the end is actually founded in fact. By Vanessa Wolf A public forum focusing on issues surrounding feral cats and chickens on Maui is planned for tomorrow night. With respect to the issues at hand, Mayor Arakawa...

What would you pay for a massive serving of baby back pork ribs with a sweet and spicy blackberry brandy barbecue sauce? $30? $40? What if we also gave you a serving of intensely buttery whipped chive potatoes with that? Before you answer: what if we were to throw in some outstanding Asian...

WARNING: SATIRE. The following is intended to give you a break from the heave ho that is life. For the most part, if it sounds too good to be true, it isn’t. By Vanessa Wolf The multinational biotechnology corporation often makes worldwide headlines for its Roundup brand, an herbicide that...

As you might recall, in earlier chapters of the story, the protagonist spends her time seeking out a wide variety of food venues across a magical land known as Maui. From corner to corner, our heroine follows numerous woodland paths, sky-high beanstalks and white rabbits, only to encounter...